Have you ever felt like you’re working hard on every aspect of your life only to come back where you started?

Certain decisions in our life are always spoken, thought about, and debated in and on with our own minds or that of a listening ear, but never acted upon. Each day the pattern repeats, you wake up breaking up with your bed, drag yourself out of the house, or in today’s context in front of the webcam, or just lay there thinking – why do I feel so heavy? Am I tired already? Did I not get enough sleep? I have a lot to do, why am I being so lazy? I don’t want to work anymore, I want to try something that I am passionate about. I don’t want to keep sleeping or do that repetitive job anymore. And then just like that, you start dreaming about how it would feel to work on something that ignites the fire in you, you know it will be lite af. You dream about the day you’ll type that resignation letter or start that Instagram page you have curated multiple times in your head and heart, and its 2pm, a notification shines on your screen and your dreams are scrolled over for that reel which just popped, and you keep doing this exact same thing day by day, month by month. Nothing changes. You on around circles and the unrealized but very real dreams remain within those constraints.

Why do we do this to ourselves? Don’t we already know what we want? Well, here’s the deal, our brain is wired to our comfort zone, it tries to protect our decisions every day. It’s instinctual to our patterns and aims that relaxing all our senses, by analyzing and reflecting our past choices and experiences. “I’ll do that after watching just one episode”, we give excuses and convince ourselves that the fatigue and extra stress after or before anything productive or unproductive is just too much work or you being lazy. What we fail to recognize that our neglected aspirations act up unrealized burdens and make us feel tired day by day.

Maybe if we try to observe and look into our decisions we will recognize that pattern, that pattern of immediately stopping when you feel unconformable to try something new, the feeling of safety washing over you, ” at least I know how to go around my rude boss, at least I have my movies and series to keep me company, at least I know what it feels to feel unhappy”

There is a lot going on beneath the surface other than just being lazy or unable to quit things that make us unhappy. What if for a moment we close our eyes and remember the times when we took decisions, decisions that made us move and try something different? Having that unmatched flavor of ice cream and immediately regretting but feeling not a bit of unhappiness for the decision you made?

Can we try to remember that feeling that comes after the seconds of uncomfort? Would it be worth it to experience those few minutes for a whole lot of adventure? To book that holiday, to open that art page, to apply for that job, to quit that job, or to go eat that pineapple on pizza.

Can we apply this same energy and go off at a tangent to stop going in circles?

I love you, I hate you, I love myself, I hate myself. I hate the world, I hate men. I met so many beautiful people along the way that in spite of a few bad people I still find this world to be an amazing place.

Words are beautiful and unimaginably powerful weapons. They have the power of creation and destruction. They have incredible healing powers and are equally hurtful too. Words are magic. In the right hands, they can change the world for the better. 

I can sit here today and rake to social media and “open up” about what problems life has actually sent across my way. I can give you detailed accounts of all of it. An endless list of 100 tiny situations and cry to the world but the fact will be that I would have done that just to gain attention. Have my 15mins of fame while pretending that I just want to show the world that I went through this and you are not alone. This little stunt is just telling everyone that let’s be sad together. This little stunt is not helping the world get better. The world didn’t change because people in tough situations decided to sit and cry for days and told everyone else let’s cry together. The world changed because those few humans, those chosen few humans decided I am gonna stand and fight against all odds. I am going to come out of this tough situation guns blazing and tell the world how I won. They gave the world answers. They gave the world words that would heal. The power of words. 

Side Note: You, yes YOU reading all this. You are an amazing, beautiful, kind and compassionate human being. You will always find strength within yourself. YES, YOU WILL. Breathe and take a break and let your mind show you where that strength is waiting inside that beautiful soul of yours. Let your mind guide you into your own safe space and you will see the magic unfold. You will feel that energy in your bones. You can already feel it. That tiny goosebumps that you are getting is a sign of that energy. There is more of it inside you. Let it guide you, my sweet beautiful human. Sending you all the love I have and I have plenty for you. I can’t heal the world but my role in your life is that of a healer and I will show you kindness and compassion when you need it.

Now let’s talk about naming every situation shall we.

Naming everything is so simple and yet a huge deal. I have this, I have that etc etc. You can never walk away from problems. There is no version of your story that will be without certain problems but in this version of your story, you will either call yourself a victim and keep talking about how things used to be and how you are always a victim now and how everything is a problem OR, BIG FAT F*CKING OR You can be a warrior. Not a survivor but a F*CKING WARRIOR and that is exactly who you are, you have just forgotten it. Warriors don’t look at what life used to be and whine, they look at what life has been till date, all the ups and downs and learn every possible lesson they can think of to fight every possible situation that comes along the way believing the entire time that THEY ARE ABOUT TO TAKE THIS VICTORY.

This is the part where you use words for yourself. When you open that journal of yours don’t just write about every little problem or don’t just write random positive words that you found online. You take that pen and start defining yourself as if you have the hand of God on your shoulder. You define yourself in the most unique way that you have been designed to be.

Words in the right hands will change the world for the better and that little world is inside your little head and you have the most perfect hands to use those powerful words.

You will always have the last word. It will always be your word against everyone else.

Things men don’t have to do/worry about/expected of:

They are not expected to be tall. At least 5’9”.

They don’t have to be super successful, have a 6 figure salary.

Men don’t have to have their own house or be able to rent one.

Men don’t have to own a car or at least a bike.

Men are not expected in the slightest to have grand romantic gestures in a relationship.

Men are not expected to work and be primary earners.

They don’t have to have an MBA degree.

Men don’t need to have full grown beards.

They don’t need to look absolutely fit.

Men don’t get rudely pushed by women while walking on the street and still be insulted by no fault of their own.

Men don’t need to have a stable life before the age of 30 to get married.

Men don’t need to worry about losing their hair.

Men don’t need to worry about leaving their house to go live somewhere else just to make enough money to support their family back home.

Men are not expected to know how to fix almost everything inside the house.

Men don’t have to worry about being emotionally manipulated in relationships.

They certainly don’t have to own up to everything wrong in a relationship.

Men don’t have to worry about securing the financial future of their kids.

Men don’t get ridiculed when they follow their passion instead of working in a corporate office.

They don’t have to worry about crying in public. Like let’s say in a movie theatre because the scene was too emotional

Men are not expected to be able to fight in a Brawl situation. They won’t be seen as a coward if they walk away.

Men don’t have to worry about looking butch all the time. They can easily have feminine traits and not be called names.

Men have it way too easy. There is literally nothing that men need to worry about so I don’t get what the men crib about or do they?

SATIRE – The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.

SEXISM – Prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination on the basis of sex.

Change needs to happen for everyone. Not just one.

To anyone who is reading and thinking “but women have it worse..” This isn’t a competition about who has it worse. Read to understand, don’t read in anticipation to use a point in comparison and be bitter about it. I believe we are all facing some form of inequality and change needs to happen for all of us.